Creating YOUR Reality in Court
I have written many times about how the family court system often sides with abusers when it comes to custody issues. I have heard some of the saddest stories in my life from abuse survivors who are treated with contempt by judges, and how their abusers get partial,...
Has Your Faith Hit a Wall?
In the theology course I took this summer, we studied the book The Critical Journey: Stages in the Life of Faith by Robert A. Guelich and Janet O. Hagberg.* In this book, the authors describe six stages that Christians might go through during their life. I will...
How Would It Feel to Get Your Life Back?
Do you dream of freedom? When I was being abused, I did. I imagined my life without the constant abuse and tiptoeing around him. What would that be like? The following is taken from my book, A Journey through Emotional Abuse: from Bondage to Freedom. In my first...
Should I Stay or Leave?
Should I stay with or leave my abusive partner? This is the agonizing question many of you are asking yourselves right now. No one can answer this question for you. There are many forces pushing you first to leave, then to stay. How to decide? There Are Many Reasons...
Finding the Courage to Ask for Change
Something is wrong with your relationship. You know it. Could it be emotional abuse? Maybe. Here is a blog that can help you decide this. If it is emotional abuse, what now? You could just walk out the door. Some people do that, but most make an effort to improve the...
Learning to Say “No”
I have a daughter whose first word was "no". At the time, it rather startled me. My other kids' first words were "dada" and "ball". For this daughter, saying "no" as her first word was prophetic. Of all my kids, she is the one with the best boundaries. What does...
How Do We Make Sense of the Bible?
I am taking a theology class at my local seminary. In it, we are learning how to correctly interpret the bible. I thought I would pass along some of what I am learning. When we read the bible, how literally should we take it? For example, are women still supposed to...
Let Abusers Reap What They Sow
I recently saw a blog outlining a Pastor's response to an abuse victim's request for help. His response infuriated me! I am sure my blood pressure went up about 20 points. Today I would like to share the original request for help, the pastor's response, and my...
That Crazy-Making Honeymoon Stage
Have you ever received a letter from your abuser where he* makes every promise you ever wanted to hear? Suddenly, your decision to leave him seems the most stupid and selfish move you have ever made. This was my experience. I was married for 20 years to an abuser. The...
Domestic Violence and Addictions
I recently read a great article on DrugRehab.com that highlighted the link between domestic violence and substance abuse. Some people believe that an abuser using drugs or alcohol causes domestic violence. This is not true. Taking drugs and alcohol does not cause...
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