Safety Guidelines for Dating
Former Abuse victims often worry about picking another abuser when they begin dating again. This is a valid concern. Why? Here are a few reasons many survivors will unintentionally pick an abuser again: Abusers are very charming at the beginning of a relationship, and...
How to Meet the Right Man?
In my last blog, I talked about how a former abuse victim can discern if she* is ready to begin dating. If you have decided you are ready to date, the next question is, how can you meet the right man? Here are some suggestions: Spend your time in the places you would...
Is it OK to Remarry After Divorce?
In the next several weeks, I will be doing a series about dating after abuse. Before I begin writing about dating, I would like to answer a question many divorced Christian women* struggle with: Does the Bible (and God) say it's OK to remarry if you divorced because...
Discerning your Danger Level – An App
Note: I recently tried to re-access this app and could not find it. If you want to determine your danger level from domestic violence, please contact your local DV crisis center, and ask to speak to an advocate. How can you know whether your relationship is unhappy or...
Holding Your Abuser Accountable – Part 4 of 4
Tell It to the Church - Last week I wrote Part 3 in my series on Holding Your Abuser Accountable. In this series I am describing the process Jesus outlines in Matthew 18 for holding a brother who sins against you accountable. This series is for you if you or someone...
Holding Your Abuser Accountable – Part 3 of 4
Bring One or Two Others Along - Last week I wrote Part 2 in my series on Holding Your Abuser Accountable. In this series I am describing the process Jesus outlines in Matthew 18 for holding a brother who sins against you accountable. This series is for you if you or...
Holding Your Abuser Accountable – Part 2 out of 4
Learn to Say "Stop It!" Last week I began my series on Holding Your Abuser Accountable. In this series I am describing the process Jesus outlines in Matthew 18 for holding a brother who sins against you accountable. This series is for you if you or someone you...
Holding Your Abuser Accountable – Part 1 of 4
I believe that the only hope for anyone to change is for him/her to feel the need to change. Let's say you are in a destructive relationship. If your destructive partner's actions are working for them, there is no reason for them to change. When their actions start...
Live at Peace
Jesus came to earth so we could live at peace with God and with others. A victim of domestic violence can be at peace with God, but she* will never be able to be at peace with her abuser. Paul the apostle counsels us in Romans 12:18: If it is possible, as far as it...
How to Forgive Yourself
In my last blog, I gave several reasons why forgiving yourself is important when healing from abuse. Today, I’d like to share some practical steps for doing this. The following is taken from my book, A Journey to Healing after Emotional Abuse. Step 1 – Seek God’s...
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